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This funny collection of friendly and delicious jokes, riddles and puns about seafood are clean and safe for everyone. Share these seafood jokes and other food jokes with your friends so you can laugh out loud togheter! Back to Food. Fish 26 Fisherman 10 Mussel 12 Oyster 10 Seafood 14 Shrimp 13. Did you hear about the fight at the seafood.


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A man walks into a seafood restaurant and was told they had Lobster Tails on offer for $1. "They must be small," he says. "No, they're normal size," replies the waitress. "Well they're old then." "Fresh today," she answers. "Then I'll have one," says the man, smiling. The waitress takes him to table and he sits down.


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It's a joke emblazoned on a thousand t-shirts and coffee mugs (I'm on the See-food diet… I see food, and I eat it…). But could we learn something from it? Apparently so, says a new study from Cornell University, revealing that the foods we leave out on our kitchen countertop are a surprisingly strong indicator of our body mass index (BMI), especially for women.


Diet Memes 25+ Funny Images About the Woahs of Dieting

To burn a few more, check out our collection of diet jokes. Short Jokes Anyone Can Remember.. I'm on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it. I'm on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat.


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Seriously how do you fuck this one up? I see what you did there. I'm gonna vote you up, but you'll still wind up at zero friend. I think it works better if it's simpler: "I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it!"


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8. Seafood diets are simple: you see food, and you eat it. 9. This diet's a piece of cake, which is unfortunately not on the diet. 10. I'm on a 30-day diet, so far I've lost 15 days. 11. My diet is like a series of hit-and-runs - I hit the kitchen, then I run away! 12. I thought about going on an herb diet, but I didn't have thyme. 13.


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Now, every time I see food, I eat it! The best diet for seafood lovers? The "see-food" diet: If you see food, you get to eat it! I told my friend I was on a seafood diet. They said, "So, you only eat seafood?" I said, "No, when I see food, I eat it!" My dietitian told me to go on a seafood diet. I said, "Great, I love shrimp.


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A see food diet is where you see food and then eat it.


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Seafood one liners. Here are some great seafood joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about seafood. I'm on a no seafood diet to lose weight. It's low crab. Just back from that seafood disco. Pulled a mussel. A fight broke out at the seafood restaurant last night. Battered fish everywhere.


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Hilarious diet jokes. 1. Why did the dietitian send her client to the paint store? To get thinner. 2. Have you heard of the seafood diet? You see food and eat it. 3. What do you lose after dieting for 2 weeks? 14 days. 4. What do you call someone who can't stick to a diet? A desserter. Related: 10 best food riddles. 5.


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The best thing about diet jokes is that they're zero calories. Lighten up your mid-diet mood with these vegan jokes and vegetarian puns.


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The Dolly Parton Diet. A guy walks into a bar and orders a light beer. "How's your New Year's diet coming along?" the bartender asks. "It's going okay, but I'm not losing as much as my buddy Joe. He went on that new Dolly Parton diet," the guy says. "It's made Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean."


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4. Basil-ically, herbs make everything taste better! 5. If life gives you lemons, add some sugar and water, and make a refreshing lemonade, then go for a run to burn off the calories. 6. Abs are made in the kitchen, but so are cookies, so choose wisely! 7. Don't be shellfish, share your celery with friends. 8.


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I'm on a seafood diet - I see food, and I eat itI'm on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it. This classic joke is sure to get a laugh out of anyone who l.


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See food diet In an interesting twist, cookies and other baked goods, like muffins and cakes, weren't closely associated with higher BMIs for women. (But they were associated with higher BMIs for men.


See Food Diet Joke Recipe Collections

1. I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it! 2. I'm an aspiring baker, but I knead a dough-lot of practice. 3. I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough. 4. I'm not a vegetarian, but I definitely feel like a missed steak right now. 5. I was going to tell a vegetable joke, but I guess I lack that much celery. 6.